here come the tears again...
I've gotta stop doing this lol
I did it guyz i called out my rapist! Can I get some words of encouragement? C:
Guys if I end up dead...WALTER did it.....
When I was little, my favorite "game" to play during summer vacation was school. I missed school and wanted to go back. I wanted to learn. This was before my family got a computer, way before wifi and smartphones were invented, so it's not like I could just go on educational websites any time I wanted. So if I had a workbook from school that I didn't finish, I finished it. If we went to the library, I usually played an educational game installed on the computer. One time all the computers were filled, so I got an encyclopedia, turned to a random page, and copied down notes about jaundice. In fourth grade, my school gave out old copies of an outdated science book and I studied from it for fun. Even as an adult, I still like learning for the sake of learning. I'm teaching myself French just because. I still have some old textbooks in storage in case I get bored one day.
I never once shed a tear because I was molested, why is it now that I'm 24 years old that I'm feeling devastated by it?And you know what's worse? That sick fuck molested my brother too and for that idk guys I joke about killing people all the time even tho im obviously not going to, but this special variety of sick fuck (the kind that takes advantage of kids that weren't even 5 years old) will pay and others like him will pay too...
A work of fiction: has violence or magic in it. My mom: REEEEEE!
I grew up from an orphanage and nobody adopted me though. I grew up mostly doing things on my own and i live by myself. Im also introverted so i dont have that much friends. I have no one really. And the only thing for me to actually find people is to explore and work at the silliest jobs. One of which was a personal cuddler and a urinal designer and yeah... the typical stripper. But hey those got me to college! But college hardwork got me to med school either so i guess the shit hole went aleight. and Yeah i made friends becuase of those wierd stories. Right now though im pretty socially established and just recently adopted a little girl. For some reason i can see myself to her. But i just dont want her to live in a shit hole and do crazy jobs. I want her to feel loved and be hugged. I want her to grow up presenting a descent self to society and setting bounds to her womanhood. But at the same time, to give her the freedom to decide what she wants to and not be forced to do things because she no choice at all. For me i could just hope im a good mother to her. I never had mother but i guess it will be alerning experience for me.i wish i got more kids though. Any kid would fine. The more the merrier
I'm jealous of my younger sister. As if it isn't enough for her to be smarter, stronger, and more popular than me, I feel like my parents give her everything that they made me work for. I had to "earn" my cellphone- not even pay for it, they just thought I should "prove" I needed it, despite me frequently staying after school or being away from home. I didn't get a phone until I was 16, a cheap HTC that I practically had to beg for. Then when my sister turned 14 they just dropped the newest Samsung model in her lap and said "Here you go!" Then they kept me from getting my driving permit until I was 19, and since then they only took me driving three times. I'm almost 22 now and I'm going to have to renew my permit (which is super fucking embarrassing that I've had it for 3 years and still can't drive) because they won't let me drive! I also had to buy my own car- which is fair, I'm fine with paying for my own car. But now my sister has just turned 17, and they're rushing her to the DMV to get her permit and my dad wants to buy her a $14,000 car with less than 50,000 miles on it, when I'm driving a $4,000 car with 170,000 miles on it. I just don't get it. Why is she so fucking special? I love my sister. She's great and I'm blessed to have her in my life. But I work my ass off to please my parents and they still obviously favor her. I don't get why I've had to kill myself to get the things I need to function as an adult in society, and they just hand her everything she wants. I'm so tired of it. And I know I probably sound like a whiny child for even writing this confession. But the thing is, I'm not mad that I had to work for things. I'm mad that she doesn't have to. I'm sick of my parents so obviously favoring her and treating me like I'm not as good as her. And don't even get me started on how they don't make our younger brother do ANYTHING. I'm just sick of it.
When I was a kid, I used to brag about how tough I am because I like scary things and can't be frightened by them. Like scary stories or ghost houses. While growing a little older, not being afraid of this became normal, but I didn't want to lose my status as a cool guy, so I told everyone how I watch horror movies when my parents aren't home. I didn't, I was far too afraid to do that. I only knew two horror movie titles, which I always named when other kids asked me which movies I've seen, which were: Cabin in the Woods and Scary Movie. Which both aren't horror movies, for those who don't know. Quite embarassing, I hope noone remembers this.