When members of my family would be particularly nasty to me as a child, I would steal random boxes from them, take the boxes into the shower, poop in them, and put them right back.

I blew a guy and let him give me a rimjob when I was 12.

Sometimes look at my sister and i cannot believe that she's the favorite...

During my childhood, I was maybe 8-10 years old, I had a two year span where I had something in my foot. No idea what it was, maybe a little stone that was in my shoe and pinched through my skin, maybe some kind of wart, I really don't know. It hurt so much while walking that I started walking weirdly and couldn't run anymore. Imagine being a child and not being able to run. When all the others went playing and ran outside, I was walking behind them, always being late. I couldn't play a lot of games. It sucked. But did I tell anyone? No. I have no idea why I didn't tell my parents that my foot hurt, maybe I thought that it's nothing fixable or I was afraid of the doctor. However, when I got a little older (about 10, as I said), I one day decided to not live like this anymore, got some pointy tweezers and... you know, got the thing out. I basically performed a small surgery on myself. It was gross, it hurt, it healed and I don't have problems anymore. But this whole thing... I don't know, it's so weird. Thinking back now, I can't believe that I actually did this. Especially living with it for 2 years.

You know what mommy I forgive you I'm done resenting you...

Don't mess with me i know how to wipe out all life on this planet...Jk.....

My mom went to have surgery...This is definately messed up but i kind of hoped that she'd die.....

I must be autistic or something.....

I hate that marijuana- the smell, the sight, even discussion of it- triggers my anxiety by causing me to think of all the hell my pothead dad put me through.

Here's a thing. The thing I noticed about depression, I know that my depression is bad and the reason is because I grew up having hypersensitive personality. Childhood wise, I grew up always being provoked to get mad and I guess that's something that I brought with me until I get older. I don't know how to explain it but that's my childhood. It is complex and full of manipulation and emotional abuse and I let that go but the attitude and subconscious growth emotions are something I still brought in with me until the time I got older (Which is now). And now, I get hurt easily when people say stuff and I get mad and I become grumpy and mad at the world and wanted to kill people who do that stuff to me. And when I say kill, I' feel like smash their heads to the ground. And now, I'm still paranoid that people talk and say stuff to me. I'm mad always mad. And deep inside I'm very sad and empty. And now, I'm a person with ambition and dreams and would just like to pursue that. But it's hard sometimes and I feel like time goes by sooo fast and I'm getting tired. And I just wanted a break from people, and the things I do. I just want to lie in the bed and stare at nowhere. I want to sleep fast and never wake up. But at the same time, I wanted a time where i can love myself and be strong and be the light and just meet good people already. Socialize... BUt where can I find good people? Everyone seems so intimidating and hating and mean.