I get tored more easily during winter time, and my family think I am more lazy.
just started a new job. mistakenly, I got involved with the guy who conducted my interview. I don't work with him directly, but he doesn't hesitate to make it really obvious we have something going on. I'm attracting the hatred of my female coworkers (he's apparently always been a flirt) and also a lot of the other guys who seemed to like interacting with me have stepped back except for one guy I knew before starting here. But now, that guy as we were all on our way out tonight, snuck a grab at my butt when we were talking to a few people today. I changed my hair, to a much more conservative style actually so I was getting a bit of attention but now I feel really weird.
the first cubicle in the fourth floor washroom at my work has been my sanctuary. not because I can poop in there peacefully but it is so comfy and private. i can rest and be alone, away from everyone. mingling with people at work is just too tiring for me.
I need a promotion, I'm on the verge of being fired, so if you're up for pizza in the States, use the code BRADLEY3 for a $3 discount on your next card order through the app! But keep it quiet on where you read this!
At work, I have a crush on my supervisor (I'll just call him E). He's my age. Well his little brother started working there too, which is cool, he's a nice kid. Well my mom (who works there too) walks up to me and nudges me and says "Wow, look at Mini E. You should get some of that!" I'm disgusted. I know I'm only 22 and he's 18, but he's barely 18 and he is fresh out of high school. I can't believe my mom would say something like that. And she knows I have a crush on E! Why on earth would I hit on his brother?! I just can't stop thinking about it, I'm so upset she even suggested it.
Our hands brushed. Was it an accident? Or did he intentionally grab my hand instead of literally anywhere else on the box? It was just for a second, if even that long, but it was just enough time to make me blush, to send an electric shock straight to my heart. His hand was cold but comforting. Rough but tender. And at a time when I felt like I was drowning, him touching my hand was like him pulling me up from down below. I just wish it lasted longer.
((EXPLICIT)) I realized that I have a kink for being told what to do during sex. The idea of a roleplay with my partner being in charge, him telling me to call him "sir" and having complete control over me, is so fucking hot. Imagining him saying things like "You like knowing you're getting fucked by your boss?" or "Be a good girl and come for me..." gets me so wet. Even the thought of him leaving part of his uniform on is so sexy! ...I just wish I had a partner to do it with.
I really think my crush is showing me signs he likes me, but my anxiety and social awkwardness make me wonder if I'm misinterpreting, or if my confirmation bias is just making me believe that the things he's doing mean something. Maybe he's just being nice and I just don't understand human social interaction enough to know the difference. Or maybe he really does like me but all this self doubt will hold me back from him and I'll miss my chance. I wish I didn't have anxiety. I hate always being afraid or doubtful.
I'm afraid to lose my job because I'm sick too often. Theoretically they can't fire you because of that and my bosses aren't assholes, but the problem is that I practically can't do my job properly if I'm not there for a certain amount of days, at least in their opinion. Which is a reason for firing me that I can't argue with.
I don't feel like going to work anymore.. I need a different job.